Shooter Video Games Dishonor Combat Veterans

Last week as I was thinking about Veterans Day, my reflection was interrupted by a television commercial promoting a popular video game. The product was one of those ‘shooter’ types. You know, the kind where the object of the game is to blast as many bad guys as you can. The longer I watched the commercial, the angrier I got. But it wasn’t because of the way the ad was glorifying violence.

Like most other men, I was conditioned to accept war-related violence long ago. I vividly recall as a pre-teen hiding in a backyard bush with my Thompson submachine gun blasting enemy soldiers in my mind. Except for the toy in my hands, everything was imagined, though occasionally reinforced by war movies I learned to love watching on TV with dad. These days however, the realism depicted in video games provides opportunities for deeper immersion of the combat experience, but without penalty. And that’s what ticks me off.

I was mad watching that TV commercial because shoot ‘em up video games disrespect the actions and sacrifices made by real combat veterans. In the comfort of your living room when you get ‘killed’, it’s all in the name of fun; all you have to do is start over. There’s no reset button though for real life service men and women (yes, women) who are exposed to real inhumane atrocities like watching your buddy’s face get half blown off or witnessing a dying soldier bleed out through holes in his chest following a nightmarish firefight. Nobody thinks about reality when playing a video game with cool music running in the background and warm pizza waiting on the table.

Some of us know Veterans Day, unlike Memorial Day which honors the men and women who died while serving, is intended to honor and thank all who served in the U.S. Armed Forces. Near our nation’s capitol in Arlington, Virginia, Veterans Day starts at precisely 11 a.m. and includes a wreath-laying at the Tomb of the Unknowns and continues inside the Memorial Amphitheater with a parade of colors by veterans organizations and speeches from important people. It’s all nice and helps us feel good about the sacrifices airmen, marines, sailors and soldiers make for us. And some of us actually reflect on those sacrifices.

But I wonder just what do armed forces veterans feel about the video games we play? Especially combat veterans – the ones who were ordered to kill or try to kill other human beings. In particular, the ones who could actually see the people they were trying to zap. And the ones who were subjected to the trauma of knowing someone was trying to kill them in return. I wonder what they think about our gee-this-sure-is-fun shoot ‘em up culture, as we sit on cushy sofas in cozy living rooms, pointing imaginary weapons at benign TV screens, ‘pause’ button at the ready in case the phone rings?

It’s embarrassing enough that, as a nation, we pay copious amounts of feel-good lip service to how much we appreciate our combat veterans. Then we summarily short them whole-sale when it comes to providing the support resources they need on their return to civilian life. But must we add insult to injury by marginalizing the very people who put their lives on the line for our freedom by pretending we know what it’s like just because we kill or get killed by undead zombies?

And this isn’t just about our kids. I’m angry at parents who sit by mindlessly as their children purchase these videos of mayhem and believe it’s harmless fun because no one gets hurt. It’s not.

Keep Education Open and Inclusive

Many public school administrative staff and teachers do what they can to address issues of racial equity within their education institutions. In most cases, it's not enough. Others believe issues like diversity and inclusion should play minor roles in education. After all, the only necessary things students must be taught to be successful are reading, writing and arithmetic, right?

Assimilation through Education...

Not so fast. If history has taught us anything, it’s that trying to educate young people without taking into account their rich and distinct culture is not only counterproductive, it’s de-humanizing.

November is Native American Heritage Month. What does that have to do with educating children? More than a century ago, Native Americans weathered considerable attempts to have their traditional ways replaced with those authorized by government ‘experts.’ This included programs that ended up removing Native Americans from their lands and the de­struction of their livelihoods.

Culturally destructive programs centered on reconditioning an entire population of people were instituted in the late 1800s. The purpose: remove Native American children from their rightful heritage and traditions and impose a ‘proper’ ed­ucation. Included was a no doubt well-intentioned, yet ultimately ham-handed indoctrination designed to compel the children of a conquered people to accept a new way of being. It was called it Assimilation through Education.

In an effort to make Native American youth proper, patriotic and pro­ductive American citizens, the government introduced federally-run boarding schools, reservation boarding schools and other day schools. Among the curriculum, schools adhered strictly to speaking English only. Classes were conducted with military-like schedules and discipline, and emphasized farming and other manual skills. The daily schedule was split between vocational training and academics. By 1893, education in this way was mandatory for Native American kids.

Material change; spiritual genocide

When the students were brought to the school, they were systematically ‘de-cultured.’ Included in the process, they were re-clothed; anything resembling native attire was forbidden. Boys were issued stiff uniforms and girls ‘proper’ dresses. For people used to an entirely different form of attire, these were constricting, often uncomfortable clothing.

The Bureau of Indian Affairs, which incidentally was part of the nation’s War Department (the equivalent of today’s Department of Defense) stopped supporting this form of education in the 1920s. Complaints about cost, substandard living conditions, poor medical care, and poor teaching practices contributed to the demise of this ultimately debilitating program.

At the time, many in government held the position that Native Americans weren’t inferior because of their race or skin color. Rather, it was because of their culture, which was no longer relevant to contemporary (i.e., white) civilization, and should therefore be discarded. The takeaway from this is that historic attempts to strip a people of their traditions have time and again resulted in cultural scarring and psychological degradation of all peoples.

I realize we are not personally responsible for the often deliberate and insensitive acts perpetrated on Native Americans generations ago. But we must hold ourselves accountable for benefiting from their rich, fertile lands and the natural resources stripped from them. At the same time, we should continue to guard against our proclivity to wholly discount and even discard non-dominant cultures and ways of being, just because they are different from what we are used to.

So as we educate our children, remember the unyielding truth that there is more to learning than the three Rs. If we don’t, we condemn ourselves to repeat the shameful parts of our American history, and rob our children of opportunities to tap into all our inherited cultural richness and seek their full potential.

Being Human is All Natural

Warning: this column contains words and phrases that some adults may find offensive – especially those who no longer consider themselves human. Parental guidance is advised.

What is it about our culture that makes so many of us uptight about things related to the way our bodies function? Or is a better question, what is it about us that makes our culture so uptight? From the way we react, it often feels like anything associated with being human is taboo, nasty, degrading or otherwise disgusting.

Folks seem more comfortable talking about intentional acts of violence than reflexive actions involving bodily fluids. The conversation doesn’t even have to come close to some of the most common occurrences in nature, like sex and reproduction, before we start getting uneasy. Why is that?

It’s as if we have some sort of self-hatred thing going on regarding the way our bodies work. If I didn’t know better I’d think most people are ashamed of being human. In many ways it feels like we aspire toward a way of being that’s more akin to all things un-living. I don’t mean like zombies; they’re undead, or at least that’s my understanding. Rather, folks these days seem to prefer the representations of people we see on TV, video games and computers to real life beings who feel breathe, consume, excrete, secrete, cry, perspire, and do every other thing related to the human experience.

I’m as guilty as anyone when it comes to this wrong thinking about certain aspects of being human. Toilet humor aside, I get uncomfortable mentally when my stomach rumbles so loud it fills the room, or I belch unexpectedly, or my bowels begin stirring and I’m not home. Feel uneasy reading this? You’re not the only one. Writing these descriptions causes me embarrassment – not because it might unconsciously set my body in motion, but because we don’t consider such things proper to discuss in polite company. Yet we’ll go on for hours discussing the distasteful act of laying off hundreds of breadwinners for the sake of increasing quarterly profits of stock holders. Go figure.

Then there’s one of the most natural acts known to man; or rather women: breastfeeding. Some find it offensive to observe in public. The way I see it is that I don’t see it. A mother is feeding her baby in the most natural way. Big deal. I don’t write a letter to the editor when some guy scarfing down a hoagie chews with his mouth so wide I can see his tonsils. I just don’t look. It’s none of my business. We all have to eat; case closed.

It’s funny; a lot of us passing a car wreck will rubberneck for a chance to observe some mayhem, but glimpse a mother feeding her child and it’s the end of the world. Even more to the point, I see people ignore what they don’t want to see all the time, with seeming ease. Like a homeless person in need of shelter. Or a poor kid alone on the street that looks hungry.

Steady are the efforts to dehumanize humans. Crying tears? You’re overly emotional. Passing gas? You’re just revolting. Sweating because you’re hot? You’re obviously unclean. Bottom line? Too human. I wonder if the awful ways we think of ourselves and our bodies is what drives the often terrible things we do to each other. The things our bodies do are beneficial and natural. What would happen if we celebrated ourselves and our bodies with the all respect and wonder befitting the amazing beings that we are?

Take Time to Feel the Important Moments

Folks close to me or who follow this column know I’m trying to use those parts of my mind, body and soul that allow me to experience emotions more fully. Well, I did just that during a recent presentation to a group of high school students. And what happened in the auditorium that evening caught me completely off guard.

I was the guest speaker at the school’s annual Academic Awards Program which honors students who earned honor roll status the previous school year. It was a proud moment for several hundred students and their parents. It also nearly cost me my treasured ‘man-card’.

Previous speakers have celebrated the achievements of the students, provided words of encouragement to maintain their level of excellence, and discussed how working hard today, both in the classroom and in the community, can pay dividends later in life. The letter of invitation I received to speak also stated that students would benefit from hearing from someone like me who has put these attributes of scholarship and service into action in the community. So I tried to do all those things in my address, plus sprinkle in the achievements of a couple folks I know who exemplify excellence.

The speech went as well as could be expected for a person who doesn’t do that sort of thing for a living. I even got some of them laughing a time or two. But the really powerful part of the program was yet to come and didn’t involve me at the podium. I did play a small part in the action but it was students who initiated it. And I never saw it coming, until it was too late.

After my address, I helped the principal recognize each student, one by one. We shook the hands of what seemed like hundreds of students as they filed across stage. After we relaxed into an efficient routine, I started noticing the students; really seeing them. I looked beyond their faces, what they wore, how they walked.

Some were giddy; others serious. More than a few were nervous. A lot of them, I could tell, would have rather not paraded themselves across the stage in front of 700 pairs of eyes watching their every move. Then it happened: I felt the magnitude of the moment. These youth passing before me, accepting recognition and receiving purple folders that symbolically represented the hard work and effort put into their achievement – for some reason, the full weight of the moment came glaring into focus.

At first it was unsettling. Then it got worse. Or rather, it got better. As student after student filed past and I shook their hands, I became emotional in response to what these kids had done. The work they had put in. The effort teachers made to help them learn. It was a small step for some. For others it was a giant leap. And I was there to recognize and honor them. It was just a moment in time with each student; a smile, my congratulations, a handshake. But it was the experience of a lifetime. For me. Guess they enjoyed it too.

For some, walking across stage like that may have been the first of many high points. For others, it might end up being their greatest achievement in life. It was for those reasons I found myself close to tears a couple times. All because I allowed myself to feel the moment. A guy could get used to this thing called emotion.

Holding in Problems is a Path to Self-Destruction

It seems like I’m running into more and more people who are working hard to destroy themselves, from the inside out. I used to be one of these individuals; still am, in some respects. But I’m fighting hard against it and wish others would too. But it’s not so easy to do in our ‘self-made’ society.

Recently I was walking across a wind-chilled parking lot with a business associate after a meeting. As we shivered and made small talk, I noticed my colleague’s face held a distinctly troubled expression, and it wasn’t from the cold. Me being me, I asked how things were going. What I got in response was shocking - not because I had never heard a story before such as hers. Rather, because of the way it came pouring out. It began as a trickle but steadily grew until what came at me surged with all the force of a tsunami.

As her conversation washed over me, I became stupefied. Not minutes earlier we were sitting in a group meeting discussing issues related to community change. Now I was neck deep in a personal drama so painful that it made my head spin. I thought, how could a person who was holding so much inside be so visibly calm in a meeting. The answer was obvious: because she had to.

Like so many people, she was overburdened with responsibilities of the family. Trouble is, no one person should have to carry so much alone. Yet as she talked, I could tell that was the case. So much was happening in her life that she felt solely responsible for, and I could feel the pressure of it all crushing down on her spirit. The things she was dealing with at home regarding her family seemed impossible to cope with alone because they involved too many other adults.

Although it bugged me she was carrying this load all by herself, what bothered me more was that she wasn’t allowing herself to feel what she was going through. She was holding it all in and shared with me a refrain common to all people who move this way in the world. She told me she had to keep things inside in order to ‘hold it together’ and deal with her problems. Trouble was, I sensed she was nearing a breaking point.

Now, I know more than a little bit about holding stuff in. Until the last few years or so that was my preferred method of operating in this world. I never shared my problems. Nor would I express how I felt. Mr. Spock was my role model and he would’ve been proud. I held in my emotions. I was being strong. Hogwash. I’ve learned it doesn’t have to be that way and that it’s okay, even healthy to share with others you trust.

I barely knew my colleague in the parking lot but took a chance and gave her a big hug. She readily accepted, and the frigid wind was replaced by a soul-warming understanding between human beings – if only for a moment. Hopefully it was enough.

A lot of us are grinding ourselves into the ground, because we’ve bought into the myth that successful people ‘do-it themselves.’ They don’t. Everyone has help. Everyone. For some reason, most don’t like to admit it. I guess when they do, the entire mystique about being ‘self-made’ evaporates and all you’re left with is a hard working person, instead of a super man. Or woman. And in the end, is that really so awful a thing?